Response to: Pilar's Raw Food, Cleansing & Supplement Log

moved from Pilar's practice log:

Akashic Librarian wrote:

What would be the consequences, in your view, of pushing yourself over the edge?

Alex wrote:

I think like Pilar said, total nervous breakdown.

I can totally get where you are coming from Pilar - please do not feel the need to elaborate too much on the causes of your trauma - in fact to do so will more than likely exacerbate the situation.

It is great that you have come to a point where you have the experience to know your own limits and know when it is time to back off. I am amazed that the Ormus had such a profound effect, and I applaud your diligent experimentation - I certainly wouldn't choose to put such a powerful chemical in my system...

I can totally relate to the manifestation thing. A naive observer would think that being able to manifest intentions faster is a good thing... Well... It is and it isn't. I.E. One fear I have is that when I am outside in the dark someone is going to come and stab me or bash me with something. I still can't control this irrational feeling, so I would hate to think what would happen if intentions manifested any sooner; It is a scary thought once you realise the power of manifestation - you really become responsible for every single thought in your mind - so if I were you I would have made a similar decision to stop the experiment based purely on increased manifestation speed.

As for the grounding, I posted a technique on the Astral Dynamics forum a while ago. I was primarily concerned with removing attachments at the time but I found this technique is extremely effective at balancing energy flows.

What I sense is that your upper chakras are way too activated. To counter this you need to get the energy flow through your lower body and fast.

I would recommend taking a small sewing pin or acupuncture needle if you have one - or some other pointy object (don't worry, you don't actually break the skin, you just touch the skin slightly), and begin gently tapping the point on your body, would start at the soles

of your feet, working in small circles until you feel some energy movement. Once you feel some movement, widen the circles or move wherever the energy is trying to flow, working back and forth along dead spots (you will get a feel for this). I would personally spend at least 10 minutes on the soles of each foot, not forgetting the toes, before working up and around your ankle and the tops of your feet.

Now spend some time working up each leg, really move at your own pace and determine for yourself when the energy is feeling balanced. This exercise can take an hour or so to really start showing some effect, so you need to have patience and perhaps be in a semi-trance when you do it.

Anyway, I would do this exercise but only up to the pelvis area, and around the hips.

I believe if you do this once a day for maybe a week, even just a couple of days, you will feel a lot more balanced.

moved from Pilar's practice log:

Pilar wrote:

Thank you both for your suggestions for balancing. You are correct that the imbalance is too much energy in the upper chakras and not enough grounding. This has happened to me in every occasion where I have succeeded in raising the amount of energy in my system. At some point I always arrive here. In some ways it is a bit frustrating, but I still have not succeeded in removing the blockages in my lower chakras, although I get closer every time to understanding where they are.

Alex, your pin-pricking exercise is a great suggestion. I think I would benefit from an acupuncture session. It is clear that these symptoms show a blockage that is preventing the full microcosmic orbit from occurring and so energy becomes trapped in the head and heart. Atom, I will look for your exercise also, and please do post it or write me privately because I feel akin to you--we are both doing similar studies. Also--what do you think about me seeing the merkaba?? Wasn't that wild? You suggested it, I read a few lines about it and saved the article you sent, and then last night I activated it for a moment. Wow--now that's an example of the speed of manifesting power of ormus.

I was thinking last night when I wrote my blog that I can fully understand why some people went totally crazy on it. Imagine taking a full bottle at once! Or even a large tablespoon! All the ormus does is increase the energy in your system, but increased energy magnifies blockages and would throw a person directly into their psychosis. This is what happened to me 2 years ago.

Philip, to answer your question--What might the symptoms be if one pushed too far? Two years ago I underwent a martial arts initiation with some careless masters who increased the energy levels in my system extremely quickly within the period of only 3 weeks. In only 3 weeks, I went from the strongest shape I have ever been in mentally, emotionally and physically to a complete breakdown. My weight dropped below 100 lbs, I had a full-blown psychosis emotionally, and my ego fell apart so dramatically that I did not have a sense of self. I literally did not know who "I" was--I had no personality of my own and was just susceptible to mimicing anyone else's behavior. I knew my name but was disassociated from my personal history and could not regain a sense of focus. I had to rebuild my life from the ground up. That is what can happen if one pushes too hard against one's own psychic limits.

I am nowhere near that point now, and I am stopping well before even glimpsing that level of stress. I am choosing to stop now because I recognize the symptoms that the same blockage in the lower chakras is still in place.

I am really excited about being my qi gong training, and I am also going to seek out a shamanistic mentor to remove some of these blockages.

Love and Light
Pilar

moved from Pilar's practice log:

Alex said:

I can't vouch for the universal application of my own experiences in the matter, but I find rejecting negative aspects causes more problems in the long run as they keep coming back unexpectedly. I have embraced my negative side as a part of me. The negativity only seems to occur when I have ignored a positive aspect of myself for too long that it manifests in a bad way. When I say I embrace my negativity I don't mean I go around being deliberately bad or deliberately feeling like crap - I just try to understand that it is a part of who I am and is a direct result of a line of experiences that has made me feel or act that way. Knowing this its easier to step aside from the negativity, because I no longer get in a flap when I do something bad, and I rarely cycle into deep depression anymore because I can recognize the causes of my feelings and don't need to dwell.

And that made no sense at all

moved from Pilar's practice log:

Alex said:

I like to call them pieces... but maybe you are right, it implies a kind of broken system so maybe "component" might be a better term?

When the components move away, some times a long way away, it seems like they'll never come back. First you have to understand the reason they went away (if you've been studying yourself for 10 years then chances are you already know this), and knowing the reason, you take the component and embrace it, give it love and protection, actually speak to it and say you are sorry for all the hurt, and that you forgive it, and ask it to please come back.

But it takes a lot of soul searching to find the hiding place of a distant component, sometimes it helps to have a good friend and therapist to lead you there.

Anyway... One last thing I thought is that humor is a great healing tool - but I am not sure if humor promotes healing or if its something which only becomes useful after the major part of healing has taken place. All I remember is when I started to laugh at how ridiculous I am for being affected by people in certain ways, those people immediately lost their power to influence me.

moved from Pilar's practice log:

Alex said:

Pilar, you are a wonderful person to talk with, you give off this aura of energy and enthusiasm and its sad to see you suffering, so if I sound patronizing please forgive me as I am only trying to help in my own clumsy way...

I think that whatever works for you is best, I'm not going to preach "the solution", if I had one then I would but there is no real cure that works for all people. But if you don't mind I will share a bit about myself, it may or may not be of value to you.

All I know is for me, I tried to forget but its so hard to forget such a large chunk of my life. There are always situations that cause me to remember - meeting certain people from the past, seeing something on TV, even eating a certain food - transports me immediately to the past.

The healing starts when the memory comes, but it no longer has a profound effect, and strange or wishy washy as it might sound, using the memory to remind me of the positive changes that came about as a result of the experience helps to nullify the pain. It's not 100% effective, but works most of the time. Certain "normal" situations still grip my body and take my breath and turn me into a lump of jelly, because I havent yet managed to learn a more effective way of dealing with the past...

All I'm saying is it's ok to stop remembering, it's good not to dwell and to find other things to think about - thats a great thing - but when you do remember and it still causes pain - try to think of the positive results...

I'm making a mess of it again... I know what I'm TRYING to say, but its not coming out right...

I really wish I could cure your pain, it upsets me that I can't, but I doubt any thing I have to say about the matter is actually helpful. I guess I try because I wish the same for myself.

Pilar, please accept a hug from me and please take care of yourself and don't listen to me, you'll be ok, you are a wonderful woman, strong, caring, funny and creative, and you deserves all the good things in life!

Hi Alex, Well thank you for all the well-wishes. I am actually doing quite well, and not in a state of pain. Talk soon, Pilar

[Alex]

Thats great to hear!

Thankyou for sharing your experiences Pilar.

Yeah lol ...it gets weird at times, but ultimately I make myself this vulnerable in the hopes that it will help someone else down the road.

[Akashic Librarian]

How do you do these Parasite Flushes and what not Pilar?

Just do a web search on colon cleansing - you will find more information than you can handle. lol